Barbqued Eggs, Anyone? Grilled Grits on the side!

I continue to learn the idiosyncrasies of the weather of the southwest – at least our corner of the southwest – and in the context of monsoon season. I imagine I’ll be learning for a long time before I really know much, based on what I hear from other folks.

Yesterday was a good example of the importance of learning weather patterns and planning around them, because the weather sure isn’t going to pay attention to minor human concerns like dinner. I had invited a friend over for supper; Nick’s gone this week so this was an opportunity to sit and visit and watch the world settle for the day. Promised to throw something on the grill and fix a salad. She was coming about 5—I hoped to serve supper, oh, 5:30 or so. Watched the clouds start to build up over the Pinos Altos mountains a little after noon . By 2ish, it was looking pretty dark and by 2:30, the breeze was pretty breezy. By something after 3 pm, lightning was snapping and leaving large claps in its wake. It poured solid for about 15 minutes, then stopped. 20 minutes later, it poured again for 15 minutes. So began my rather anxious sky-watch. I had everything ready but for starting the grill. When my friend arrived we made a joint decision that we’d risk it, since we have the outdoor room and the clouds were moving in from behind us. So I started the grill, sizzled a few raindrops and got supper going. We were fine, as it ended up. But this was the second time I had planned to grill for company and just about the time to light the charcoal, the clouds opened up.

When I lived in DC and traveled a lot, I learned never to try to fly into DC in the summertime between 4 pm and 7 pm because of the likelihood of thunderstorms. Here, I need to learn not to plan to grill after 3 pm during monsoons if I don’t have a backup – meaning I can put that chicken breast in the oven or on the grill: let Mother Nature decide. Or, I’ll plan all my barbques for breakfast, when it’s sunny, bright, cloudless and cool. Barbqued eggs, anyone? Served with mesquite flavored bacon and grilled grits!

Speaking of Mother Nature, here’s the conversation I had with her recently (me is me and MN is Mother N…)

Me: Have you been a little confused here lately, MN? You’ll forgive my asking, but…
MN: (Tall, white cumulus beginning to gather on the horizon…)
Me: Now, I mean no offense, but what I’d heard about May and June and July isn’t the way it seems to be this year.
MN: (Cumulus beginning to get a little gray; low, warning rumble…)…and just what have you heard?
Me: Well, (slight tremor in voice) that May is pleasant if breezy, and June is when it gets hot for two or three weeks, and then at 3:55 pm on July 4, you announce the monsoons by drowning out Independence Day…
MN: (Seriously dark clouds) Go on…
Me: (plunging ahead heedlessly) But this year, you got it all – I mean, it turned out all – I mean, maybe things are a little…backwards?
MN: Backwards? Confused? What do you know, you silly little Easterner (loud thunder claps deep in the clouds)
Me: But this year, it rained in May, was cool and sunny and pleasant in June with occasional showers. It did rain right on time on July 4, and we got a hint that the monsoons were starting on cue.
MN: (Laughing with glee – which looks suspiciously like lightning flashing across the sky)…and then I broiled you!
Me: Well, yeah, that’s the point. Suddenly it dried up and heated up and we’ve been roasting with 95 to 100 degree weather the last couple weeks. What’s up with that, anyway? People turning on air conditioning, complaining about the heat, dragging around looking a little fried. Poor dog doesn’t want to walk outside after about 10 am and it’s too hot to go out again until 7:30 or 8. I’d like the monsoons back again, please?
MN: (Clouds caving in with torrents of rain)…sure thing, girlfriend, but be careful what you ask for. Remember the old adage about me? I’ll paraphrase it for you: “You don’t insult Mother Nature” Next time you invite folks for dinner and you’re getting ready to fire that grill….